Desiree Dallagiacomo


Desireé Dallagiacomo is a poetry and nonfiction writer. She is a performer, educator, and space creator. Her book of poetry, SINK (Button Poetry, 2019), is available wherever books are sold in real life and on the internet. She grew up in Northern California and now lives in Baton Rouge, Louisiana where she teaches poetry and organizes creative space in public and private schools. She started teaching in public schools 10 years ago, and that’s how she learned how to write. She works independently and with Humanities Amped, an organization amplifying youth voice, human connection, and civic engagement in high-poverty public schools in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Desireé is one of two poetry educators on staff. In 2016, she founded The Heart of It, an intimate and intensive writing retreat in the high desert of New Mexico. Des started performing in poetry slams and open mics in 2009, and she has been a finalist at every major poetry slam in the United States. She went on to coach youth and adult slam teams, and in 2017 she coached the Forward Arts youth poetry slam team to an international championship at the largest youth poetry slam festival in the world, Brave New Voices. Source

Where Did You Get That Pick-Up Line? You Should Drop it Back Off

Excuse me, sir. Are you the moon? Because I need you 

238,900 miles away from me.


You make me want to go to Hogwarts 

so I can make you disappear.


Oh my god you’re so funny…looking.


Are we at the rodeo?

Because this conversation is bullshit.


You look so strong. Why don’t you go take down the patriarchy 

and heteronormative ideals while I sit over here and watch?


Your advances and excess touching and jokes are all so funny 

I decided to tell them to my lawyer.


You make me think all kinds of naughty things,

 like where to hide a body.


If I had a nickel for every time I heard that line, 

I would throw them all at you.


You want to know how I got these guns?

Working out because I’m terrified of violent masculinity!


You remind me of 1919, 

the way I don’t have a say in this exchange.


Can I please have 78% of the time you’re giving me, please?


You and my bra have something in common— 

You’re both annoying and make everything less enjoyable.


You look like a wonderful piece of meat,

You would look great under a butcher knife.


You must be a tree the way I see you and think,






Literary Movements:

Spoken Word

Anthology Years:


Humor & Satire


Literary Devices:


an expression designed to call something to mind without mentioning it explicitly; an indirect or passing reference


the use of irony to mock or convey contempt


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